So, I got a message from someone today and I didn't know what to do. The first thing I saw on their profile was their: You should message me if.... you like tattoos and long hair.
I don't.
But then I thought about how this is about giving everything a chance, not letting your preferences limit you, being open to people beyond their appearances.
So then I looked more closely at their profile and they talked about wanting to be present, about meditating, about being open and curious to new things...
And I thought that I should respond, that I should set up a meeting in person, that I should look beyond those things that seemed to turn me off, to consider looking beyond their profile.
But as I read through their profile more, I saw a bunch of spelling mistakes (sorry, they aren't a deal breaker but they're also not a selling point for me) and I saw that none of their books or movie interests matched mine and then I looked at their photos.
They just didn't attract me- I just wasn't attracted to this person and I seemed not all that interested in their interests and the one thing they said I should message them about was something that I didn't really like.
"I think you're trying a little too hard to make this work," I thought to myself. "I know you want to be open but you're not helping anyone by pretending to be interested when you are not. You're not attracted, you're not interested, let it go."
Ad later, I realized, that though he messaged me, he probably wouldn't be all that interested in me either, if I wasn't in to tattoos and long hair. Who wants to go on a date with someone who is willing to "tolerate" you just so they can "see beyond your profile."
So I decided to not respond to his message. I didn't think he needed me to write back and say, "Sorry, I'm not interested," who needs that in their life?
And I guess this helps me to see why that first guy didn't respond to me- he just wasn't interested, that's all. Sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn't, move on.
No comments:
Post a Comment